Holiday weekends are great, but afterward it's always difficult to get back to the daily routine. Otto doesn't want to get up for school, John barely makes it out the door, gallon of coffee in tow, and even Mort is less communicative than usual. Plus over the long weekend I lose all my momentum. Fortunately, most of my deadlines are self-imposed, so there is a bit of wiggle room. But after this weekend, I'm beat.You'd think just one extra day off wouldn't make a big difference. You'd be wrong. Having an intelligent child is great, but there certainly are some side effects. Like when they rewire the dishwasher for an experiment and neglect to tell you, causing all the water to end up on the floor. Or when the dinner you prepared has been pureed without your knowledge "just to see how it would taste." And here's my favorite: The television was reprogrammed so that the channel numbers are now in hexadecimal. And John was no help. At least to me. He was helping Otto with these projects! I love geeky projects. But a little forewarning is always thoughtful.So I retaliated by leaving the house all day Monday to write and lounge at the local bookstore and coffee shop. I thought being left to their own devices would be a useful exercise in responsibility. I was wrong. I came home to all of our furniture arranged for a huge Tetris game.So I showed them finding a long pillow to insert into the one space they couldn't fill. Take that!And now, Calgon, take me away!
I've come up with a new business idea. I'm kind of sick of there no longer being logical sizes such as small, medium, and large. They keep shifting upward, so that large is the smallest you can get. That makes no sense. And it's getting a little old having John come home from work, shaking like a leaf, because he drank too much coffee-related drink product. So I've decided to start a website suggesting we move in the other direction.
The new sizes shall be, in increasing order of size, Itty-Bitty, Tiny, Wee, and Small. I don't see that it's any more ridiculous than going in the other direction. The cost of products in these sizes will also of course decrease. This will give consumers more options. They can order an Itty-Bitty if that's all they want. Or a Small if they are really thirsty. Or a combination of sizes. With small sizes, there is always the option to order more. But with huge sizes, you can't order half of a drink!
So to all you marketing folk out there, join me in taking back the smaller sizes!
Since John and Otto are off watching Thor, I decided to have some fun of my own. So today I'm Sif, Norse goddess of earth, and Thor's wife! So I've been walking around the house, shaking my "long, golden tresses," cursing Loki under my breath. He cut off my hair! But I was so lucky to have my Thor make Loki procure a golden headpiece for me.
I have to admit, I'm enjoying the long hair (made out of my old Halloween costume wig from when I was Rapunzel and John was a knight). It makes me feel all... girly. It's almost novel. But I've found that I have to move around the house slowly as I've already pushed some books off the table and knocked over a glass of water. I've also gotten it caught in the front door.
Mort is being kind enough to stand in as my son Ullr, which basically entails him sitting there looking interested while I keep pretending. I think he's really reading the newspaper sitting in front of him, but still, he's being a good sport about it.
I hope John will dress up like Thor when he gets home!
I hear other moms complain that when school projects come around, the parents end up doing more work than the kids. They have to buy the materials, keep on their kid to make sure they finish in time, and clean up the mess... I just don't understand it. Sure I had to pick up a few things for Otto at the store this morning for his latest school project, but sometimes I feel like I just need to wind him up and let him go. He's so self-sufficient! Well, at least when it comes to these kinds of things. Plus he always works on things about which he is very passionate. We should all be so lucky!
As soon as we got home from the store with some plaster of Paris, some paint, and a few army men, I turned to talk to Otto about his project and got out half a word before he grabbed the bag out of my hand and said, "Thanks, Mom! Let me know when dinner is ready," and then he disappeared. I've learned not to pry, realizing that boys like to have their secret laboratories. But I sure hope he doesn't practice making plaster casts on Mort. Frogs aren't known for being good patients.
Edited later to add: I've now seen Otto's completed project. It is very well done, if a bit... revisionist. I'm very curious to see what comments his teacher will have!
